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Dept. of America

I Am Silent In the Face of Heartbreak

Every year, I try to write something about this country on July 4, because I love it. 

(Oh sure, you do, 
[personal profile] kaffyr  ... how come you're not a citizen?)

But this year, after eight months of surreality - 

(What makes a country great? What makes it great again? How can it become great for the first time?)

I find that I cannot.

(Some must think that makes me a traitor. Some must think I must be spineless. Some must think it makes me a patriot. I think it makes me confused.

I still love it.

(Can't figure out why, except that it's still got a chance to be great, and isn't that almost enough?)

So I turn to music. 

This man's guitar killed fascists. 





This man was prescient in so many ways, but he was wrong about the revolution. Or maybe he'll still be right. It's apparently the counter-revolution that's being televised. 



This American Woman slays - and she frightens racists. 




And this one ... I forgive him for forgetting that there were a lot of folks here when the Mayflower arrived, because ... because, because, because, and partly because of the beauty of their two voices. Every year this one makes me weep more. 


This entry was originally posted at http://kaffyr.dreamwidth.org/667298.html?mode=reply, where there are currently comment count unavailable comments. You can comment there or here, but prefer to read over on DW. You can comment there using open ID if you don't have a DW account.

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
a_phoenixdragon
Jul. 4th, 2017 11:41 pm (UTC)
Thank you for this, honey. To tell you the truth, citizen or no - you are more American than some I can say. Your deep love for this flawed, but hopeful landmass of confusion and extremes resounds through every post. Bless you. And thank you.

*HUGS*
kaffyr
Jul. 5th, 2017 04:08 pm (UTC)
You are very kind, my dear. Loving this country is hard right now, but I guess it isn't love, at least not strong love, if you can't hold on to it during the hard times.

*hugs back*
eaweek
Jul. 5th, 2017 02:57 pm (UTC)
Same here. I did not feel especially patriotic this year. My own "song that says everything I can't articulate" is John Mellencamp's "Pink Houses."
kaffyr
Jul. 5th, 2017 04:10 pm (UTC)
That's a good one, definitely, and eve11 had a good one over on my Dreamwidth journal: Grace Potter and the Nocturnal's "Ah Mary."
elisi
Jul. 5th, 2017 04:53 pm (UTC)
(Oh sure, you do, kaffyr ... how come you're not a citizen?)
Funny thing, I'm exactly the same with good old Blighty. Been here 20 years, and yet.
kaffyr
Jul. 5th, 2017 04:58 pm (UTC)
Yep. I have been unable to say the oath, because it requires me to give up all allegiances to other governments and crowned heads, and I can't do that. Also, the U.S. doesn't recognize dual citizenship. If you take American citizenship, it ignores any rights you might claim as the citizen of another country. (The only exception is U.S.-Israeli citizens, and that's a function of the history of Israel more than anything else.)

At one point, I decided it was a better thing to become an American (deciding that just because it was hard for me to do didn't mean it wasn't the right thing for me to do); then the money I'd saved up for citizenship was required for the bill when our then-car's engine block cracked. I never returned to the idea.
elisi
Jul. 5th, 2017 05:09 pm (UTC)
I have been unable to say the oath, because it requires me to give up all allegiances to other governments and crowned heads, and I can't do that.
Yes, I read Andrew Sullivan's article on becoming a US citizen, and just couldn't get over the oath and the swearing allegiance to the flag.

then the money I'd saved up for citizenship was required for the bill when our then-car's engine block cracked. I never returned to the idea.
Yeah, the money. If I win the lottery, we'll see. But for now, it's quite simply not feasible. And what with Brexit, I'm just waiting to see what happens. :)
flowsoffire
Jul. 5th, 2017 06:32 pm (UTC)
kaffyr
Jul. 5th, 2017 07:57 pm (UTC)
right back at you!
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )

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